Bienvennue a Montreal: Manger et Diner...

Comment vous pouvez gagner du poids quand vous etes dans Montreal. Part 2 in a series.

Where ever you wander in this life, whether you create a most-detailed, to-the-minute itinerary or you simply show-up and roll with the punches, a little preliminary food-research will always serve you well. (I mean, why would you ever eat at Mickey-Dees and contemporaries, when there are entirely new palates and flavours to be discovered?)

And Montreal is no exception. Crepes and poutine are a must. (although, I would caution against in one sitting.) We didn't find anywhere that served the exceptionalle, so ask around, eat around (and then let me know where to procure the best of the best). Bagels, we missed out on, but worth a sampling, being toted as the world's best after New York.

A trip to Montreal is not complete without a Montreal Smoked Meat Sandwich. We checked out Reuben's on Ste Catherine, which boasted the best smoked meat sandwiches in the city. So what is Montreal smoked meat? (known simply, as smoked meat when you're in the city.)

Some compare it to pastrami, brisket or corned beef, but anyone will tell you that authenticity can ONLY be found in Montreal. You can even bring home a brisket for Ma and Pop. (I didn't. Should I have? I was thoroughly chastised.)

Reuben's serves up thin, pink slices of smoky, salty goodness, stacked mile-high on a dense, malty slice of rye, lightly kissed by the toaster. A pickle and a hot pepper add a little oomph, and the pungency of the mustard just cuts the saltiness of the meat in a very special way. Reuben's may look unassuming from the street. But head down stairs, and you're instantly taken into a very classy, and very out-of-date deli.

The staff were most welcoming, but it's the food that will have you coming back for seconds. And taking a brisket (or two) home with you. (seriously, can you pick one up for me?)

Ah, M:Brgr. A place that sells $49 pitchers of sangria, $400 bottles of dom and $500 for a bottle of cristal. I had a coke. We made the mistake of going here for lunch. Come hungry, and stay for dinner. M:Brgr is not some simple burger joint. With ingredients on the menu such as goat cheese, smoked apple-wood bacon, fois gras, truffle aiole and porchini mushrooms, this place takes gourmet burgers to a whole new level.

For those on a beer wallet, there's AAA beef, and for those with champagne tastes, try the kobe. We came for le big zak. ($15.95)

This is how a Big Mac should taste: fresh ingredients, lovingly prepared. The burger is prefectly grilled, the whole-wheat bun lightly toasted. Tomatoes and lettuce are crisp and fresh. And the "secret" sauce? Secret, no more! Try le petit big zak ($9.95) and save room for M:Burger's delicious sides. We shared a seemingly unlimited bowl of french-fried onions, which absolutely sang in my mouth.



Alas, no pictures of le petit big zak. It was devoured too quickly. But doesn't this intrigue your appetite?


A trip to Montreal wouldn't be complete without a night of french cuisine. Chez Goutier was a quick walk from our hotel. The patio was intimate and tres classy.

Not only do the French know how to eat, but they know how to dine. Eat late, eat long, good food, good wine, good conversation; the recipe for a perfect evening.

We began with a French Onion Soup. And if you've never had Onion soup before, you don't know what you're missing. (And if you've only tried the Tim Horton's incantation, then you are truly depraved.) The beef and onion broth was light yet hearty. The soup is simplicity: broth, onions, fat pieces of bread sopping in flavour. Top it with cheese, and then bake. It's a soup that'll put hair on your chest and meat on your bones. Perfect after a long winter's day, and delightful on a patio on a cool summer's eve.

For the main course, I thought fish? butter? Parfait! The salmon was moist, light and not overwhelming. The butter-sauce was absolute divinity. It was served with green and yellow beans, which were perfectly prepared and tasted like they were picked yesterday, next-door.

Of course we drank wine. Which I would recommend, not dry, not sweet, just the prefect red.


A cafe au lait and creme brulee rounded out the evening. Chip away the perfectly caramelized crust to discover a creamy, not-too-sweet custard. Heavenly!

Dinner for 2? $116.

We didn't get to taste any Quebecois cuisine, but I urge you to go to Quebec City for the split-pea soup. And maple-syrup specialties.

To enhance your Montreal experience drink lots of red wine, perrier and expresses and cappuccinos. Eat lots of croissants and pastries.

May you come home, 10 pounds fatter.

Bon appetit!!

Stay tuned tomorrow for the third installment in my Bievennue a Montreal series. Où sommes-nous? Ce quevous pouvez découvrir si vous êtes perdus à Montréal

Bievenue a Montreal: Acheter et Magasiner...

Comment passez-vous tout votre argent quand vous etes dans Montreal: Part 1 in a series.

So the big to-do was the underground mall, La Ville Souterraine or RESO. All the travel literature, and people on the street all seemed to be urging us to check out the WORLD'S. LARGEST. UNDERGROUND. SHOPPING!!!! (yaaaa!!!haaaa!!!yeahhhh!!)

I don't understand the big draw. It's stores. Underground. Like a mall. Only more artificial and zero natural light. I don't even really like malls. I much prefer walking down a strip.

Besides, as I told Irish: "we have underground shopping in Toronto."

"We do?" she replied.

Check and mate.

The Eaton Centre was no where near as impressive as Toronto's. But the shopping on Ste. Catherine Ouest, just outside of the centre was good. Similar to Yonge and Dundas.

Simmons is a place to check out: a fashionable department store, exclusive to Montreal and Quebec City. The prices are pretty reasonable, and I think you'll find that Montrealers are more cutting edge than their Toronto cousins. The European trends tend to hit Montreal before Toronto. But then again, you're running the risk of looking like a freak for several years before the trend hits the general population. 

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Like these high-waisted bloomer polka-dot shorts.

H&M, $19.95

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Or, a ruffle-shoulder tee.

H&M, $14.95

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Or even a fancy veil, suitable for all your mourning needs.

H&M, $9.95
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Went a little bit crazy at H&M. Found some more studs. (Trying to bring 'em back. Spread the word.)

H&M, $4.95
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Of course, needed more large sunglasses. They're kinda my thing.
H&M, $5
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Vieux Montreal (Old Montreal) was by far our favourite. Its where the artists come to sell their wares. Definitely check out the original art, sold on the street by the artist. Acrylic, water colour, lithograph, photography and even caricatures; there's something for everyone. Unique jewelry, clothing and gifts can be procured here as well. Plus, the cobblestone walkways just give Vieux Montreal such a delightful old-world feel.

One thing we noticed was Montrealers' love of stationary shops. I have never seen so many shops devoted to paper. And such large and extensive shops! Not a great place for two journalists to walk into. Nevertheless, we showed restraint, purchasing one notebook each.

Sure, everything we saw you could pretty much find in Toronto. But Montrealers have the luxury of one stop shopping. And bonus? Blank paper is bilingual!

I couldn't resist the small notebook with the sentiment, "Une bonne action n'est jamais perdue." (A good deed is never lost). $6.50.

 

Ya, I bought a sex book. What's it to ya?

Backstory: For Beat Magazine class, Irish, Brown, Grey and I (henceforth, known as the Douches) are creating, writing and producing a magazine and website about 'sexual education as a lifelong process'. Sex-ed doesn't end after highschool.

Sexology was a magazine that launched in 1933, and became defunct in the seventies. It was considered humorous, informative and frank. And sometimes ludicrous. It was certainly risque, and paved the way for magazines such as Cosmo and Playboy. Ironically, Sexology met its inevitable demise, because it couldn't complete with the frankness of its predecessors.

The book is a compilation, "The best of Sexology: The Illustrated Magazine of Sex Science: Kinky and kooky excerpts from America's first sex magazine." Got the book from the most delightful store (origins, currently unknown) which had all sorts of useless yet delightful wares.

Tea bags with celebrities from Audrey Hepburn to Bob Marley to Obama chilling in your tea cup, jacuzzi style. Fake promotional pens from 'Springfield Sexual Addiction Center' and 'Dr. Lance Hughes, Proctology'. Bloody shower curtains. Precious kits for pigtails or explorers. And not to mention a great collection of uber entertaining books. Like Sexology. $16.

It's worth it to check out the gift shop in the Notre Dame Basilica. (I know, I know). It's actually pretty classy. Rosaries, crosses and nice gift items for all your Catholic needs for Baptisms, First Communions, Weddings, etc. I bought a new magnet for my fridge collection. (Seriously, the easiest travel collection to maintain. not to mention cheap!) $2.


So, there you have it. Shopaholic takes Montreal! Stay tuned tomorrow for the second installment in my Bievennue a Montreal series. Manger et Diner: Comment vous pouvez gagner du poids quand vous etes dans Montreal.

Travel blogger, extraordinaire!!

So perhaps I shall pen une petite voyage series about Montreal. I could break it down day-by-day journal style, but I shall give this a go, travel-writer style. Thus, look out for themed posts about shopping, eating, getting lost, tourist attractions, strip clubs and the people. That would be such a dream job, travel-writer. Just go off to places and explore and eat and converse with the locals and write all about it, all on the company's dime. Mmmm or food writer. I think any profession where you have to try out new things, because you get to sample the best of the best, and often before the general populous. So look out tomorrow for "Acheter et Magasiner: Comment passez-vous tout votre argent quand vous etes dans Montreal" Aussi, j'ai un rendez-vous pour jeudi!! Zut alors! J'oublie la musique!

Witty titles still on vacation...

Ahh, Midnight. I missed the deadline to have today's post up in time. I haven't written anything since Sunday, with that spurt of scheduled posting. I dicked around all day with all the (400 or so) Montreal photos. Trying, in vain, to get this shit on a narrated slide show on the interwebs. Did accomplish a facebook album, captions included. Went to the parents house, broke down in tears when they told me they're getting rid of my piano. Its beautiful and ominous, dark wood. The ivory is yellowed, and chipping in places. The ebony is luxurious. It has a very mellow, organic tone. I'll never have a piano like that again. Anything nowadays may be asthetically pleasing, but has a synthetic, artificial, cheap feel. So I went to drown my sorrows. Actually, I went to console a friend who got dumped. Nothing like a good ol'fashioned male bashing* Discovered tonight that my new-found-favourite radio station is - wait for it - Zoomer Radio. I am turing into a 70-year-old women. I never go anywhere without a cardigan, I watch jeopardy and I enjoy a good nap. That vacation wore me out. Good thing I have the weekend off. I shall have to share my 'Tales from a Strip Club' for another eve. *No males were harmed in the making of this post.